Tuesday, 21 June 2011
A TRIBUTE TO THE SUN!!
We interrupt your local blog broadcast to bring you this special Sunny bulletin…
“Keep your face to the sunshine and you will never see the shadows”
Helen Keller might have originally said it, but I know someone who is living it right now. As much as anyone can.
As much as any other mother can, if they wanted to.
If I wanted to.
To keep my face to the sunshine, that is. And I do want to.
But I never would have known what direction to face in order to find happiness if she hadn’t come into my life (through my screen!). Truly a gift from above, and a blessing I didn’t think I deserved at the time, I began my journey on the long road to happiness because a fellow mother decided that it was more than ok to put herself first. That to be truly happy she had to look after herself first, in order to look after her family best (I just LOVE that quote!). And that that was more than ok, it was absolutely essential. Not only that, she had the desire to help other mothers see her logic too. Oh yes. Not content with just looking after herself, she endeavoured to look after every mother in the country – and thank goodness she did, because that’s when I found her blog. If you only read one blog in your life, then stop reading mine, and start reading hers.
Who the heck are you talking about Em?
I’m talking about Stacey, the Original Sunny Mummy, who sees the sun in absolutely everything she does, and who I feel deeply indebted to for creating a community that has been my saving grace while on my motherhood journey.
I began having children early, after marrying a man who made me smile in so many ways and whom I loved so very dearly. Creating life was the perfect way to express the amazing love we felt for each other. We didn’t take much time to get to know each other, we got along so well as mates I guess you just figure that whatever happens, happens and you’ll be able to handle it together.
How wrong I was.
With my hormones, I might as well have painted myself green (a la The Incredible Hulk) and gone on a rampage every day. I had no idea why I felt the way I did, so there was no hope in communicating it to my poor husband who had no idea either. 3 pregnancies in under 3 years all with their own unique stories (as we all have with our precious children) which produced 3 healthy children (to which I am supremely grateful for) and I am still trying to figure out why I cry for no reason, why I lose my temper all the time, why I blame everyone else, why I want to run away from it all and never come back, and why the sunny, happy, energetic old me was replaced with grumpy, frumpy, angry, shitty, sooky, sleepy… and Doc (yeh, my own 7 crappy dwarfs)… me? Everything I did was wrong, not good enough, and I was the only mother in the world who felt like this. Everyone else just seemed so effing happy. Why couldn’t I be happy? What was wrong with me? I felt no joy, no sunshine, undeserving.
Then I found Sunny Mummy on facebook, and through that, Stacey’s blog.
I cried when I read what she had written, and not because it was shit (!!), but because it struck a chord with me. My deep, dark hurts received a ray of sunshine… a ray of hope. What I had found difficult to articulate before began to make sense, and what’s even better is that once I started to know what it was that made me feel the way I did, I could embark on a journey to change it! Stacey isn’t a shrink, but when she writes she has a way of connecting with me (and I hope all her readers!) that makes me feel she is sincerely concerned for my wellbeing, it gives me things to reflect on, and her happiness seems to be infectious! You can’t avoid it, even if you wanted to! I found that not only is it more than ok to feel the way I had been feeling, I also had the tools within me (and the AWESOME planning tools available that Stace has created) to create the type of person I truly desire to be. AND I also now have the motivation and support to really SHINE, and BE AMAZING!
Within the Sunny Mummy Sisterhood is 402 other mums (tally correct at time of typing!!) that I can talk to whenever I need to, about anything, with no reservations. I have 402 other mums who support me and send their love and sunshine to me whenever I need it. I have 402 other mums who, when they need me, I am there for, supporting them in any way that I can be it with words, hugs, sending things, phone calls… I have 402 other mums who, at this point in my life, I need, who make me laugh, who help me cry, who mean so much to me that I feel I have 402 more sisters than before!
Stacey created the Sunny Mummy Sisterhood for mums to have a safe place to go to bask in the Sunshine. What a wonderful place you have provided!
From the bottom of my heart, from the depths of my soul, I can’t thank you enough Stacey. I feel so different, and I doubt that I would have found the same results anywhere else. You have given hope to me when I had none. You have shone your light in my darkness, and made me Sunny again. And I see this in all of our Sunny Sisters, because of what you created.